How to Have a Better Orgasm, According to O-Man—L.A.’s Orgasm Whisperer




But I am just one slutty woman. Are O-Man’s methods actually sound?

According to medical experts, there is some scientific basis to his practices. “Without being overly familiar with the concept, certainly it wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility that improving orgasm could be a really fortuitous byproduct of increasing alignment,” said Melanie Stevens Sutherland, a pelvic health physiotherapist and founder of the Toronto-based practice Body Co Health and Wellness. “One of the things we know when we look at pelvic health is that one of the main functions of the pelvic floor is sexual tone [the tone of the vaginal and rectal canals and their ability to contract and relax for a positive sexual experience], enjoyment and pleasure. What we’re looking for is a good balance in muscular tone and muscular mobility. So he’s not wrong that being in good alignment optimizes those conditions.”

“I do agree that alignment is important and that it can definitely impact pelvic pain,” said Christi Pramudji, M.D., a urologist and urogynecologist who runs the only urology practice in Texas exclusively dedicated to female patients, often with sexual dysfunction. “There’s no scientific data or proof, but logically what he does makes sense. Because if things are out of alignment, the muscles are spasming, they’re tightening the blood flow so that is not as good for the pelvic area. It’s possible that [O-Man’s techniques] really could make a big difference.”

Both Sutherland and Dr. Pramudji, who noted that my descriptions of O-Man reminded her of Victorian treatments for hysteria, were quick to add troubles with orgasm tend to be a multi-pronged issue that require different treatments for different people. Dr. Pramudji treats patients with everything from physical and sex therapy, medication and hormonal treatments for pelvic pain and lack of arousal, and Cliovana, sound wave therapy for the clitoris. “We know that the only way to actually truly know what somebody’s pelvic tone [the muscle tone of the pelvic floor, impacting all its functions including hip and back stability, sexual function, sphincteric function and continence, and the support it offers to the internal organs] is to do an internal exam, and it’s affected by so many other things,” said Sutherland. “It can be really from a whole biopsychosocial perspective. So somebody’s mental state or anxiety, or the resting tone of their nervous system can impact muscle tone.”

They added that the most essential sex organ is the brain, and that treating psychological blocks (such as those from sexual trauma or severe anxiety) is often the answer to curing sexual dysfunction. But I’ve found O-Man helpful there, too. In addition to his emphasis on clear, honest communication, he makes every single client say, as they come, that they deserve it. This earned a rave from Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, Ph.D, a professor of sexual communication at California State University, Fullerton. “In my research, another variable that predicts orgasms is sexual self-esteem, and sexual self-esteem is whether or not you feel like you are worthy of pleasure,” she said. “Reiterating verbally that you are worthy of this will fully tell your brain that you are worthy of it. Then one day you know you’re worthy of it.”

Dr. Suwinyattichaiporn, who recently conducted a 5,000 person study determining that sexual mindfulness plays an enormous role when it comes to the ability to orgasm, also thought that O-Man’s certainty and confidence could contribute to his treatments. “I think it plays a big role in the ability for women to let go and stay present in the moment with pleasure,” she said. “Instead of thinking about, “oh, I have to move my hips this way. I have to do this. I want to make sure he’s happy. I don’t even know what I look like. I’m a little self conscious about my body.’ So many things, right? But if he’s able to be there and like, ‘Listen, I’ll take the wheel. You enjoy,’ you’re really able to tap into your sexual mindfulness.”

O-Man is, ultimately, there for your pleasure (and to soothe your pain; while hunched over my laptop like Golem, writing this article, I paused every hour or so to do his recommended neck stretches). “Bodily intelligence is something I’m very, very proud of and passionate about in terms of my own contribution to the people in my life,” he said. “I want people to be able to tell their own story through their own bodies.” My posture now tells you everything you need to know.


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